The Movie Death Count Quiz
That big glass house in the sky where movie characters go must be getting pretty packed. Disney alone has killed off enough mothers to fill a cemetery the size of California. Then there's the sanctuary for protagonists who sacrifice themselves in a noble fashion, the monument to unnamed extras killed by super villains and bad guys, and the hallway of unrealistically perfect characters in chick flicks and family films who die tragically in a calculated attempt to make you cry. If you're a character in a movie, you're probably going to want to take out a pretty meaty life insurance policy fast because you may die in the next 85 minutes. Here are some classics (and not-so-classics) with characters who die. Can you guess which movie has a higher death count?
Moviebodycounts.com (yes, there is a site devoted to this purpose) was used as a source for most of the death counts. Only deaths depicted at least partially on-screen are taken into account, so if James Bond's Aunt Myrna died off-screen while he was at bars fussing about the preparation of his martinis, it's not included here.
Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me or James Bond's The Spy Who Loved Me?
It appears as if Austin Powers is ten times better of a spy than James Bond as only seven people died on Powers' watch to Bond's 73. Most of the deaths in The Spy Who Loved Me are baddies that Bond kills out of necessity though, so there weren't too many civilians that perished while Bond frolicked with the ladies. Still, I'll take Austin Powers any day; he seems a lot more fun to gamble with.
Forrest Gump or Paranormal Activity?
It seems unfair that poor Forrest has to endure more death than a possessed ghost-lady but sometimes life is like a poisoned box of chocolates: you never know what you're going to get. Also, you'll probably die. Forrest's mama, Jenny, Bubba (nearly everyone Forrest loves, really) die in Forrest Gump, but only one person dies in Paranormal Activity.
Lion King, Bambi, or Beauty and the Beast?
The death in Bambi is the most famous, but it's also the only one in the film. Disappointingly, there's no forest vigilante gang Bambi forms to gore and dismember the hunter who killed his mother. Many adults will point to Bambi as the film that traumatized them at a young age, but I've always wondered if it had the same effect on kids who grew up in hunting families. Did they just salivate over the Bambi mom venison? Beauty and Beast likewise only had one death, with the deadly fall of the hero of the film, Gaston, (did I watch that movie wrong?) being the film's only casualty. That makes this an easy win for the lion king, which is probably too violent and dark a movie for kids to watch, but hey, the singing boar cancels it out, right? No, no it doesn't, parents.
Taxi or Taxi Driver?
This is the only time the Robert Deniro classic has probably ever been compared to the Jimmy Fallon torture device of a film, and even here Taxi loses. Four people die in Taxi Driver and sadly, not a single person in the Taxi Universe is put out of their misery. In the fictional New York City of Taxi all the characters are forced to listen to Queen Latifah's wise cracking for the rest of time.
Shaun of the Dead or Dawn of the Dead (1978)?
Not even close. 178 in Dawn of the Dead and a mere 60 in Shaun of the Dead, which may be the reason Shaun ends up surviving in his zombie invasion.
Titanic or all five Die Hard movies?
It took a while but John McClaine has finally seen more death and destruction than a little old lady on a luxury cruise ship. (Is that why they kept continuing this creatively bankrupt franchise?) The totals are 307 for Titanic and and 373 for the Die Hard films. Of course, this is only accounting for deaths that are shown on screen. The real life tragedy of the 1500 people killed on the Titanic still makes Bruce Willis look like a pansy.